If you have the daily habit to take a shower and brush your teeth to keep your body clean, then cleaning out the mind cannot be excluded. Letting go is not just a general saying of “let’s forget about it,” nor it’s a sneaky scheme to escape from the past so we can move on with life. Sometimes our logical mind might tell us that we’ve already done with the process of “letting go,” but somehow the heart doesn’t feel so, which is very tricky (I totally understand!)
We want to let go many things in our life, but feel so defeated and trapped when we fall back to the same old stories (or toxic habits). We cling on to our old way of thinking, either by chewing on the past events like a drug addict or worrying about the future like there’s no tomorrow.
Why is letting go so hard? We have to admit that it does feel more comfortable and less challenged when we surround ourselves with the familiar faces and things in life. The idea of moving forward and forgetting about the past can make us feel unsafe and threatened because we can’t get the unknown figured out.
It’s time to raise our LGQ!
It’s too bad that no one is born naturally with high “LGQ” (Letting-Go quotient.) So, I look at letting go like a muscle group to be developed. The awareness of “what exactly needs to be released” always comes first before we can push the “letting go button.” If we are not clear about what really needs to go, it’s likely we might attract or seek something similar to replace the old thing/emotion/pattern that is being released.
It’s like how we train our muscle groups in the gym. How can we shape our body with the machines if we don’t even know which muscle groups to work out on?
For example, letting go of an ex. What I really want to release is the sense of loneliness, not necessary letting go of the feeling toward the ex. So rather than asking “how can I find my next boyfriend,” a more valuable question can be “how do I heal the part that feels lonely?” or “What activities can fill myself up, so I don’t feel lonely?”
Growing our letting go muscle group doesn’t get built up over night. But with simple conscious practice, we allow it to grow stronger gradually. Simultaneously, we train ourselves to be a curious observer, without judgment. We make space for the new and acknowledge the fact that we are in the process of letting go.
Don’t force the process
What is no longer serving you could be a toxic relationship, lifestyle or habit that may have caused emotional pain and you just want to cut the cord ASAP. The fact is that you are not dealing with a project due date. Sometimes you may think that you’ve already let the old pattern/story go, but it comes back to haunt you again. Don’t fret over it.
It takes time to be fully processed with your heart, not just by your logical mind. It’s important to make peace with whatever that you want to release. Thanking the part that you want to say goodbye to as it has served you in the past as precious life experience.
Even if it takes longer than expected, it’s totally ok. Let it unfold organically without trying to control the outcome. Allow that part of you peeled away by itself without forcing it to happen. Life is a paradox. The more the effort, the stronger the resistance we build. The less the effort, the faster and smoother the road we are on. You might be surprised to see the shift happening quicker than you thought.
If for a while the harder you try, the harder it gets, take heart. So, it has been with the best people who ever lived.
― Jeffrey R. Holland
Breathe away the negative emotions
Along with my self-discovery journey, what I realize the simplest, yet the most profound practice is “mindful breathing.” For most of us, breathing is still only an involuntary action for the sake of sustaining our life. Since we are trapped in our head (worrying about the unpredictable future or ruminating on the past) most of the time, we breathe shallowly on a day to day basis.
As long as we don’t consciously breathe into our body, the less we allow ourselves to enjoy the present moment. Let’s practice more mindful breathing and know that just by taking one single deep breath, it invites the good to every cell of our body, and release what no longer serves us.
So, join the Mind-Body Detox 6-day Challenge now! It’s a great chance to release the inner talk that’s been blocking us from what we are meant to be, feel, have and do here. Start purifying our inner space and body temple with practical strategies to feel more connected from within and regenerate our life force for the year of 2017!
Sign up here: 6-Day Mind, Body, Soul Detox Challenge!
Sending you lots of Love, Joy, Peace & Happiness,
xoxo,
Jen
