Ever felt this way? One day, you’re in the mood to go all out, sharing your deepest thoughts and feelings, pouring your heart out. But on another day, perhaps you just want to keep things close to your chest, not inclined to share much at all. Does this fluctuation in expression make you question your authenticity?
😶
I had a fascinating conversation with my dear friend the other day about how to stay authentic when expressing ourselves without the need to overshare or undershare.
After all, we are part of a social tribe, and there’s a level of vulnerability when it comes to being seen as who we really are. There’s an inherent sense of unworthiness in being seen with our totality because, unconsciously, we believe that there’s something fundamentally wrong with us, making showing up as who we are feel like a raw, dangerous act – an irrational ancestral narrative.
Transparency is indeed important, but there’s a fine line between transparency and respecting one’s privacy. The level of vulnerability varies from person to person and also with each individual’s seasonality.
There are times when we have full confidence to summon our courage and share something deep with others because we choose to trust in the moment. Other times, we may not feel as self-assured, and we might experience a stronger dose of vulnerability hangover or even wonder why we had to share so vulnerably. 🥸
One thing for sure is our logical mind will try its best, in all means, to strategize its perfect invincible plan to protect our ego from getting triggered or potentially hurt (via feeling shamed, embarrassed, or experiencing a sense of low self-worth), even if our hearts know that going towards the opposite direction will bring deep healing and allow PEACE to emerge.
It’s natural to resist your heart’s calling to show emotional vulnerability since being seen or perceived as a total fool or an irrational creature is something our egos want to prevent us from doing or being taken advantage of.
What does leaning into Peace feel like to you? 🤔☮️
I’ve learned that the depth of vulnerability requires building upon how much trust we have within ourselves. 🙏🌹
When communicating something intense with others, you can choose to speak about your viewpoints or concerns while allowing yourself to feel vulnerable yet courageously non-judgmental at the same time. 🌹
It would be precious and greatly appreciated if people understood where you’re coming from. But if not, at least your self-trust is solid enough to still hold your ground.
If the extent of emotional vulnerability is too much for your current psyche to manage, it’s okay to express your need for a pause without sacrificing your honesty. 🤓
I’ve learned that oversharing won’t make you extra authentic, but the inability to show vulnerability will kill authenticity.
“𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 100% 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙄 𝙖𝙢 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙠 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙩𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙮 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙄’𝙢 𝙗𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙘𝙚𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙙.”
“𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 75% 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙄 𝙖𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙞𝙛 𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙨𝙖𝙛𝙚 𝙚𝙣𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙮𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛.”
“𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, 𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙚𝙧 𝙫𝙪𝙡𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙮 𝙚𝙭𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 1% 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙄 𝙖𝙢…”
“𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙖𝙮, 𝙄 𝙙𝙤𝙣’𝙩 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙬𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙥 𝙖𝙨 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 40% 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙄 𝙖𝙢. 𝙄 𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙡𝙚𝙙𝙜𝙚 𝙢𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙮, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄’𝙢 𝙨𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙡𝙮 𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙮𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡 𝙨𝙖𝙛𝙚𝙧 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙, 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙥 𝙖𝙩 𝙖 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚.”
None of the above is wrong. Each scenario is authentic in its own terms because they are honest about how they truly feel in the moment and the level of transparency they are comfortable in sharing. ❤️
Authenticity is an intricate dance with ourselves in the moment, and what feels like Peace may be subject to change. But if we want to show up more authentically in life, we need to also practice inviting self-compassion into the picture as often as possible. 🙏🪷🪷🪷
There’s no absolute equation for this, but I find Peace returning to my heart the moment I respect another person’s receptivity while letting my standpoint be witnessed or heard. This is when emotional sensitivity comes in handy as a highly sensitive empath.
If your intuition says “no,” honor your sacred feelings instead of worrying about being judged for being too hard to handle. Listen to your inner needs.
Unfortunately, there’s no one-size-fits-all peace recipe that applies to every single person on the planet. 🌍 What makes you feel peaceful might be different from mine. 🌹🙏 😆 But I find intuition speaks the clearest when our body softens, our mind relaxes, and our breath deepens.
Don’t fight against your peace. Continue to explore authenticity by feeling into your own 𝑷-𝑬𝑨𝑪𝑬: 𝑷𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝑬𝑨𝑺𝑬 as your inner compass. 🥰🙏🦋
“Leaning into your Point of Ease with compassion sets you free.🪷” — Jen Yang
xoxo,
Jen
